Call it a... gut feeling. No, more than that. Hard to describe, but I just know. It doesn't make as much sense, con-contextually.

[ A little more manly then ~I feel it in my heart~, he thinks. Though that is also true. ]

Which, I know, isn't the most reassuring thing in the world, and you're all about definite, absolute proof. With me, I've long since realized that there's... there's always gonna be this uncertainty, this 'what-if'. What if I go bugnuts and rip someone's guts out again? What if we... end up back in cages?

[ Very viseral discomfort, building and building, until he steels his voice and squares his shoulders. ]

You just can't lose yourself in that spiral, or the bad guys win.