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Heyyyyyyyy, kiddo, you've reached me. Me who is Rhys. Anyway, not sure why you're trying to get in contact with the king of the dweebs, but I'm sure you've got your reasons. Reasons you should probably re-examine. I'm just sayin'.

Last chance to back out.

No?

Don't say I didn't warn ya.

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I do it with everyone, pumpkin. Part of my image.

[Which doesn't really matter here, but shut up. He likes his catchphrases.]

So, about this whole 'copy of me uploaded into your brain' thing. Details. Now.

[ CRAPCRAPCRAP ]

I, uh.

[ CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP ]

Am actually just crazy. You were right all along. Like always! So you can just disregard that, okay? Like I never said it. Because it was just psychobabble.

Right.

[This is already getting annoying.]

Y'know, when I first saw that video you posted, I- I couldn't even figure it out. It looked familiar, but I just couldn't quite place why. But after your quote-unquote "psychobabble"? Can't unsee it.

[Honestly, he should have recognised his own speech patterns right away. Not like he hasn't listened to plenty of recordings of himself.]

And let me tell you, it is really kinda creepy to look at. Like staring into a mirror and seeing a significantly less good-looking reflection.

...hey...

[ Okay, no, his looks getting dissed isn't what he should be focusing on. He shakes his head, like that'll help clear his thoughts. ]

Soooo that means you liked my Handsome Jack impression? Coming from you, that's -- th-that's the highest kind of compliment I could receive. Thank you.

Hey, credit where credit's due! You were acting exactly like me. Except for the parts where you were blatantly trying to get everyone pissed off at you.

[Jack usually only does that subtly.]

It was almost like, I dunno, you were being controlled by a copy of me or something. But that'd be crazy, right?

Right?? Th- that's just so ridiculous. I'm just nuts.

[ LAUGHTER!! ]

I mean, where would I have gotten a copy of you? They don't just hand that out to n... [ This is hard to say. ] ...nobodies up at Hyperion.

Exactly! That's what I've been trying to figure out!

[LAUGHTER! LOOK AT US LAUGHING TOGETHER WHAT A FRIENDLY CONVERSATION]

Of course, they don't usually involve nobodies with opening Vaults either.

I told you, I just fell into -- with the -- and

[ The laugh overed quickly, though. As Rhys finally accepts that he is backed into a corner. Keeping up the lie is just too much. He takes a break to lean into the nearest wall and whine for a full minute so he has some semblance of composure when he returns to the conversation. ]

...what do you want from me? I- it's exactly what I said.

All I want is the truth, kiddo. The whole truth.

[Listen to that reasonable tone! So calm and collected!]

I mean, you can't exactly blame me, right? First I die, then I get thrown into a crappy snow town in the middle of nowhere. No money, no robot army, nothing. Information's all I've got here.

No, but the whole truth is... a really long story.

[ He's heard that tone. Back when Jack 2.0 was trying to ally with him. Which he rejected. And he's been regretting that lately, sort of. Kind of. ]

Important parts: I had to install Professor Nakayama's credentials for reasons, and, uh. You were in his ID drive too. The other you. AI.

Naka-who? -No, forget about that. Doesn't matter right now.

[Eventually he'll vaguely recall the weirdo who wanted to make an AI version of him, but right now it's not important.]

So what'd you do to piss the AI off? Not exactly the smartest idea after letting it into your systems like that.

He [ A very pointed, almost defensive gendering. ] and I are just. Going through some things. I don't wanna get into it.

Sure.

[There's an amused snort. How cute, he thinks the machine ghost is people!]

One more thing. How much does "he" [you can practically hear him doing finger quotes] know about the events surrounding my death?

You know, you shouldn't be so flippant about this, since he's kind your legacy. Because of the aforementioned death and all.

But, ah. Not a whole lot? He knows he's dead, at least. Awkward conversations were had.

My legacy is a copy of me stuck in the brain of an idiot and trapped in exactly the same position I am. You're right, I should be goddamn thrilled.

[But okay, now he knows that the AI is not aware of Angel's death. He's not entirely sure what to do with these circumstances yet, but at least he has the most relevant information.]

Yeah, I can't see any benefit of an immor-

[ WHAT is he doing. He has an easy out right here. Jack can go ahead and believe that HoloJack is a dumb program that stomps around brags about his abs. That'll make him much less inclined to exploit him.

WINNING. ]

You know what, just forget it. It's not really important after all, huh.

[Oh, Jack sees the possible benefits of an AI copy of himself. The problem is that he also sees plenty of possible drawbacks. You can't trust anyone, and especially not an AI.]

What's important is not getting our asses frozen off, so I'm gonna get back to working on that. Talk to you later, kid.

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